January 23, 2010 Ben

..a sigh of relief.

Not much has really gone on since my last post.  I think with the winter and my cold bed I find that being single seems to suck more and more.  Other than that thought, I’ve just been doing a lot of working.  Last week was extremely busy which usually means I’m doing well at least in the money department, but that’s not always true.  I do value the work though.  I think that once I can put my nose to the grindstone (such an odd expression) that it allows me to forget my problems and work on someone else’s.

I was told this week that it seems I lack self confidence which explains why I am without significant other.  I don’t think that’s true personally.  I may not be the most upbeat person when it comes to myself, but I’m not constantly staring into my life and wishing for the sweet embrace of death.  I think the reason I’m single is I really haven’t tried to get out there and find someone.  I’m not quite sure why that is, maybe I’m just not ready.  Maybe I’ve grown used to the single life and except for the cold bed have come to love it.  I don’t think that’s true either, but I must say that sometimes I enjoy just being here and talking to my cat while I play games.  I think they help take my mind off of it and let me live out my fantasies of being a dwarf hunter with a large gun.  I wonder what that says about me? :)

I have grown a beard since the last time I made an entry.  I think it’s coming in quite nicely and I must say that I find myself more attractive with it.  I realize there are people out there who don’t like beards, but they’re just jealous of my mad beard growing skills. :D  In all seriousness.. I do like it though.  I can’t say that I will be growing it down to my stomach and start playing a guitar while singing about “Legs”, but I will grow it a bit.  Keep it moderately trimmed and looking cool.  I even had a pretty hot chick give me her number the other night.  Not sure why, but she hasn’t called me back yet.  Maybe she’s unsure about the beard or was just trying to get a big tip on her check (yea, she was a waitress).  I must say that would be a good tactic for someone who would tip big.  Unfortunately I’m not really that type.  I tip based on how well the service was and it was OK.

Well.. I think I’ll wrap this up by saying that yes.. I am still alive and kicking.  I am still single (almost a year now), and yes I am a total hermit crab as of late.  Hope everyone else is having a nice life and enjoying the choices they have made.

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